Chill out
A few years ago I was working with a client who struggled with anxiety. (This is putting it mildly.) The client came into my office one day and was in the midst of an anxiety attack—and a fairly severe one at that. The client was barely able to walk, so intense were the anxiety symptoms. Fortunately for me, I was studying dialectical behavior therapy at the time, so I had just learned a set of basic self-soothing techniques. My office was just around the corner from the kitchenette, and the client was seated on my couch, so I told the client I needed to step out and would be right back.
I came back from the kitchenette with a small bucket of ice cubes. “Here,” I said to the client. “Just hold onto a few of these.” The client took three ice cubes from the bucket and began to hold them. Almost magically, the anxiety symptoms began to diminish. The client looked at me, eye to eye, and smiled. Ice was the answer.
Why? Because we experience our emotions in our bodies. That means we can regulate our emotions by making a change in our bodies, particularly a change of temperature. A writer I know will take a shower or bath when she feels stuck, and she emerges from the water with a new insight. I don’t use ice to calm myself down, but only because I prefer washing my hands and face with very hot water and soap. Another method: fill a shallow bowl with ice water and hold your face in the water for up to 30 seconds. Our bodies can’t stay anxious if they’re being asked to focus on a powerful physiological experience. Holding ice can be painful (as can the hot water), and sometimes it’s the pain that breaks the “spell” of anxiety. Other times it’s just the slight shock of coming into contact with warm or cool water.
So the next time you’re feeling stressed—and particularly if you’re having an intense experience of anxiety—try using ice or cold water to literally chill out!
