Are you thinking about getting some counseling? Good idea! And if so, I suggest you stop wondering whether you need it, and definitely stop asking the question, “Are things bad enough that I need to go to counseling?”

I work alongside a couple of massage therapists in my little office complex, and sometimes I envy them. I envy how their field is understood by most people: anyone can say, “Oh, I had a massage today, and then I got a haircut, and the sun’s out, so…a great day!” But rarely will you hear someone say, “I set up a counseling appointment to work on my emotional-regulation problems, and to finally face the fact that I’m not being very mature in my relationship.” No, most people won’t say that, even though it would be a remarkably mature thing to say!

So that’s why most people look at counseling as a last-ditch effort to pull their little airplane out of its fiery plunge, or see it as something you do if—unless you get some counseling—your life or relationship is about to collapse.

I started seeing a therapist myself in May 2006, which is one of the reasons why I had enough confidence to leave a great job here and start my own private practice. I knew that I needed someone to help me get a better handle on myself, my goals, and some of the ordinary neurotic software that was still running in my very normal human mind. I wasn’t about to lose my partner, or my job. I wasn’t becoming self-destructive, and certainly wasn’t within a thousand miles of feeling suicidal. But I knew I needed a hand. I still see her, and these days we work on who I am, what kind of relationship I want to keep cultivating with my partner, how my beliefs and attitudes affect how I run my business, and so on. There’s always something to explore.

And often enough I feel like I’ve just had a massage when I leave her office. Take it from me: you aren’t “psycho” if you’re seeking counseling. If you’re taking this step, you’re probably one of the most mature and courageous people you know.

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This entry was posted on Thursday, July 8th, 2010 at 2:13 pm and is filed under Being Your Best Self, Self-care. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.